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Man on man. It's been a crazy few days...

Shynee is pregnant! She showed me the little photo of the forming fetus yesterday. She's hoping for a girl, her husband is hoping for a boy. I'm positive I do not ever want to be pregnant. Jeff used the word husband a few weeks ago. It was weird. It's our 5 yr anniversary on July 24th. I hope he doesn't propose or anything. I've already said I think marriage is unnecessary for us and we should just leave things the way they are. I don't recall what his response was, but whatever. I'm not tying myself to him legally for him to fuck me over in a short amount of time.

Wow I'm so hungry.

Anyway, after I sent that email to Lori, we chatted the next day on the phone. She gave me the low-down on the job. The job is Customer Service and being a Trade Show bitch - travelling across Canada to consumer shows and trade shows and working the booth. I have really bad people skills and stage fright so this definitely was a big deal-breaker for me. The current person didn't go on these shows twice a month for 9 months of the year because she couldn't be trusted to stick to the script. She's very outspoken and doesn't like people telling her what to do. So they didn't let her go. They want the next person to be able to do it. Lori could tell this wasn't what I expected. I asked to think it over until Monday.

Right after the 11am convo, I hauled ass to head over to the Toronto Island Airport to fly to Halifax, NS. Jeff met me at Union and drove me the rest of the way. Then we waited an hour for our 1:30pm flight. The lounge is really nice! Free snacks and drinks. The flight was fine except for the headache I had. Being on a plane with a headache blows. We had a stopover in Ottawa. It was only 20 minutes so we had to stay on the plane. Jeff's parents met us at the airport and drove us home. Jeff's dad's hair was to his shoulders! *lol* I felt super comfortable this time around. I chatted and everything was great.

Jeff's Parents

We ate salmon and rice for dinner which was super good. But then Jeff wanted us to sit outside at midnight in front of a fire. I was reluctant because I feared bug bites... Jeff got a little ticked and forced me outside. The mosquitos had a feast on nobody else but me. Ugh. Mosquitos bite me on the neck, my chin, and right ass cheek, and my right hand on the knuckle. They swelled up pretty big... I had to attend the Paul McCartney concert the next evening all fucking itchy and burning and swollen. It was terrible. BUT, I was trying really hard to forget about it. But I couldn't and Jeff was pissed off at me. We fought again at the show. He said that he thought I'd be more excited and he said I just looked depressed the entire time.

Anyway, the concert was fab. There was 50,000+ people there. Around 7am on the day of the show we deove over to the Commons to see the stage and figure out where the entrance would be. There were people there already standing in line so that they'd get front row lawn seats. Paul wasn't even scheduled to go on stage until 9PM that night!! They stood there for a long time... Once you were on the grounds, you couldn't leave and expect to get back in. Crazy! We bought the $300 VIP seats so we were in the grand stand and didn't need to worry about that.

I slept most of the time we were at the house. I had a headache and I just wanted jeff to spend time with his parents on his own without me. We left at 6pm for the show and were there until almost midnight. Joe Plaskett opened but we walked the grounds while he was on. I ate some fries and then we went to our seats. I'll cut together some of the videos later. Here are some photos from the show:

Paul went on around 9pm. Opened with the first song on Rubber Soul, Drive My Car. He sounded amazing. He was so cute too! He played for 2 hrs and 45 minutes. CRAZY!! I will never forget singing along with all those people to Hey Jude and Let it Be and Give Peace a Chance. I almost cried when he sang 'A Long and Winding Road' and 'My Love'. He even had the ukulele that George Harrison gave him. He played it while singing the beginning of 'Something (in the was she moves)'. It felt extra special to me cuz I've been reading Pattie Boyd's autiobiography and George wrote that song for her.

Helter Skelter, A Day in the Life, Yesterday, Back in the USSR, Blackbird, Eleanor Rigby, Mull of Kintyre (with a full set of bag pipers!!), Dance Tonight, Live and Let Die, Band on the Run, Jet... I can't remember the rest of the set list; it all went by so quickly. He didn't take any breaks either. 67 years old!!!

Jeff's parents said they heard the music from their backyard so they decided to drive over and just watch through the fence. It's a big open field so they could see the big screens and hear the music really well. They watched the whole show from outside the grounds. We met up with them at midnight and drove to Fongs Restaurant for egg rolls to take home. We ate and went to bed.

Next morning I slept until noon. Jeff and I went for a drive. I bought a donair at Island Greek which was really good (I'm not a vegetarian anymore by the way. I'm not even sure what donair meat is even made of...) Our flight was at 5:45pm so we just hung out with Jeff's parents some more until it was time to go. They drove us to the airport and we waited for our Air Canada flight. The candy machine ate more of my money than it was supposed to. My bug bites were driving me crazy. I was so stressed. I started to cry in the lounge... We boarded and Jeff listened to a Smodcast with me (one with Kevin and Malcolm. I think it was Rurally Gay). The one where they talk about the GlassAss.com site and bifurcated dicks. Jeff was shocked. I laughed.

Richard picked us up at the airport and drove us back to the Island airport to pick up our truck. Then Jeff and I went home. We went to sleep wicked early. I was so happy to see Mewes!!

The next morning I had to give Lori my answer if I was going to take the Marketing job or not. The decision weighed heavily on me throughout our Halifax trip. I was 85% sure I was going to say yes. I kept trying to convince myself that this was the next step in life and I needed to take a leap and just commit to learning how to talk to people. But I knew in my gut that I was going to hate it. Probably moreso than my current job. Jeff wanted me to take it, but I started to cry and freak out. I had to say no. I got into work and wrote out what I was going to say. Lori called me at 11am and I told her I wasn't going to take it. She said she understood, but if I wanted it, the job was mine. She said lots of really nice things about me too. I still couldn't accept it. I said I know myself and I know that I couldn't do it for the long haul. So I had to talk to my boss and let he know since Lori already semi-mentioned it to her. UGH.

So a few hrs later I had a meeting with my boss. I staretd off saying "You probably already know why I'm here." and she said "yeah...." So I confessed that I hadn't been enjoying my job for the last few months and I know that there aren't many jobs available here so I decided to jump at the Marketing one when it opened up. But I didn't realize it involved so much trade show work and I'm terrible at public speaking. (She said she's in the same boat with public speaking and takes the ToastMasters course.) Anyway, we talked it over and they understand. But they don't want me to leave. I said I would keep doing IT full time until the end of August. By September I do not want to do it anymore. She said that's fine and it might leak into mid-September to find my replacement which I said was okay. She said we'll figure out what kind of work I can do in September. I agreed to be the secondary/backup IT to the new person which I'm fine with. I'm not sure what other work is available... but I'm not worried. I can finally breathe again. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

Tomorrow Jeff and I are going to Summerlicious. I picked Zucca Tratoria in midtown (Yonge/Eg). It's an Italian restaurant. Before that though I have a meeting with David to finish up the graphics work for the Gypsy Rebels CD cover. They dug the cover I designed so I have to finish the back cover and the insert. David is the liason between me and the band.

Next Tuesday I have my gum grafting surgery. Fuck. I'm piss scared of that one. And I won't be able to smoke for a few days after. Meh. When I stop smoking dope I lose like 10 lbs. *lol* After this surgery, I swear to God my ED will be over for good.

and I don't mean vajayjay.


I had a dream that a can of white beans had whey in them and it made me sad haha.


VEGAN FOR LIFE. <3 (idealistically)

About 24 more under the cut...

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Автор ABOVE

via Wooster

I think I'm ready.

Caps Balls Crew

Lurking hurts my heart sometimes..
I am trying to keep my mind off of a lot of subjects right now.

Started school...poop.
possibly getting a job the CAN CAN haha.<3
maybe going to AZ tomorrow with larry to go do something,and see eric!!!<3

Haven't seen much of zach,ever since i moved back to my dads,its been kinda hard to see him.
Hes pretty bummed about it.I feel bad or being with someone who can't even see me or spend time with me,hopefully we will work something out,if he started tattooing already we could fucking move out and get a place.haha BUUT lets not think so far ahead.I know what happened last time i did that..

I really need to go riding.I haven't had any time to,and i have a flat..
maybe when i get back from AZ i'll go around chyenne.seeing how i don't really know this side of town well.